| (no subject) |
[Oct. 3rd, 2010|08:43 pm] |
Found a girl, it was awesome, and I got really, really excited. Got my hopes up again that it was going to go somewhere.....and yet again, I got led on horribly, and lied to. This is the third time in a row that I've been lied to, and lead on. For this instance, she didn't tell me she was seeing someone, they got in a huge fight, so she went out with me a few times, and said she was really interested in it going somewhere and then decided to tell me they made up and that even though she really liked me, they had history. Real fucking cool. Glad I'm out $50, lol. Not that it even matters, I just always bring up money I've spent on people when i'm upset at them. It's really shitty, but it's something I do, whatever. I'm just really disappointed. If she hadn't said repeatedly how interested she was in me or "I really like you and hope this goes somewhere" on friday night, I wouldn't be so pissed off. But, as they made up on saturday, I guess she wasn't actually lying when she said it. She was just omitting the part about her seeing someone else, and going with me because they had had a big fight. So what happened then? Was it a super big fight that she thought it was over, and thought I was really cool, so was moving on? Or is she one of those girls to need someone 24/7 so out with the old, in the new, but wait, back in with the old. Or was I used to make him jealous? I doubt it's that one. I doubt he knows about me. It's stupid, but it's over so I'm dropping it. I'm just upset because I really tried this time.
Here's a good song I heard for the first time:
I've been beaten down, I've been kicked around,
But she takes it all for me.
And I lost my faith, in my darkest days,
But she makes me want to believe.
They call her love, love, love, love, love.
They call her love, love, love, love, love.
She is love, and she is all I need.
She's all I need.
Well I had my ways, they were all in vain,
But she waited patiently.
It was all the same, all my pride and shame,
And she put me on my feet.
They call her love, love, love, love, love.
They call her love, love, love, love, love.
They call her love, love, love, love, love.
She is love, and she is all I need.
And when that world slows down, dear.
And when those stars burn out, here.
Oh she'll be here, yes she'll be here,
They call her love, love, love, love, love.
They call her love, love, love, love, love.
They call her love, love, love, love. love. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 27th, 2010|04:25 pm] |
EQUALITY FOR ALL
Refocus Our Nation’s Fiscal Priorities
End the foreclosure epidemic and save the homes of America’s families
Reform bankruptcy laws to protect families and working people
Prioritize affordable housing for all
Protect and strengthen Social Security and Medicare
Repair private pension systems
Complete the promise of health care reform, including the public option
Provide greater national investment in new jobs, improved infrastructure, and education instead of increased military spending
I'm so tired of stuff like this.
"Refocus our nations fiscal priorities"
On what?
Prioritize this, protect and strengthen that. No plan. Just goals. I'm tired of "winging it" America. get a fucking plan. carry out said plan. Enough empty promises. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 21st, 2010|07:25 pm] |
Telling someone a honest observable fact should not be creepy. "Hey, you're really pretty." That shouldn't be creepy. It really shouldn't. For example, today, i told an aquatince that I was a really big fan of hers. I am, lol. I don't really know her that well, but 1. She's arabic, so I already pay more attention to her than other girls, 2. we like the same music 3. she's very pretty 4. we have talked like 4 times, but each time they are really open, good ass conversations. Where both people share deep views. It's like...you know how sometimes it's easier to be open with a stranger, and maybe you're a little too open? it's like that, but it's a blind trust, because they've never done you wrong. She's taken so it's not even like that, but it was just awesome.
AND
It puts a whole wrench in the "talking to people you don't know is creepy" kinda thing that happens at college. Everyone should talk to everyone. We're in college!
<3 |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 19th, 2010|10:06 pm] |
“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?
Then he is not omnipotent.
Is he able, but not willing?
Then he is malevolent.
Is he both able and willing?
Then whence cometh evil?
Is he neither able nor willing?
Then why call him God?” |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 29th, 2010|08:55 pm] |
You talk too much
Maybe that's your way
Of breaking up the silence
That fills you up
But it doesn't sound the same
When no one's really listening
We stumble into our lives
Reach for a hand to hold
Any wonder we need to find
A certain something certain
Turn out the light
And what are you left with
Open up my hands
And find out they're empty
Press my face to the ground
I've got to find a reason
Just scratching around
For something to believe in
You have too much
And spending all your time
Collecting and discovering
It's not enough
And no matter how you try
You never find the one you want
We stumble into our lives
Without a hand to hold
Any wonder we need to find
A certain something certain
Turn out the light
And what are you left with
Open up my hands
And find out they're empty
Press my face to the ground
I've got to find a reason
Still scratching around
For something to believe in
Something to believe in |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 21st, 2010|04:58 pm] |
If it makes you less sad, I will die by your hand.
I hope you find out what you want.
I already know what I am.
And if it makes you less sad, we'll start talking again.
And you can tell me how vile I already know that I am.
I'll grow old and start acting my age.
I'll be a brand new day in a life that you hate.
A crown of gold. A heart that's harder than stone.
And it hurts a whole lot, but it's missed when it's gone.
Call me a safe bet. I'm betting I'm not.
I'm glad that you can forgive.
I'm only hoping as time goes, you can forget.
If it makes you less sad, I'll move out of the state.
You can keep to yourself. I'll keep out of your way.
And if it makes you less sad, I'll take your pictures all down.
Every picture you paint, I will paint myself out.
It's cold as a tomb, and it's dark in your room,
when I sneak to your bed to pour salt in your wounds.
So call it quits or get a grip.
Say you wanted a solution. You just wanted to be missed.
Call me a safe bet. I'm betting I'm not.
I'm glad that you can forgive.
I'm only hoping as time goes, you can forget...
You are calm and reposed. Let your beauty unfold.
Pale white, like the skin stretched over your bones.
Spring keeps you ever close.
You are second hand smoke. You are so fragile and thin.
Standing trial for your sins.
Holding onto yourself the best you can.
You are the smell before rain.
You are the blood in my veins.
Call me a safe bet. I'm betting I'm not.
I'm glad that you can forgive.
I'm only hoping as time goes, you can forget. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 12th, 2010|09:59 pm] |
Dear Body,
Stop making me force feed you. I don't care. I'm not creative enough to make you happy with what you're eating, ALL the time, okay? It's good for you. You need it, so suck it up and take it like a man.
Stomach,
Stop being a little BITCH all the time. You ruin everything, I hate you. There is nothing to be super anxious about to cause you to lock up, like you used to a few years ago, so knock it off. You're an asshole.
<3 Stephen. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 7th, 2010|10:34 pm] |
Writing my first play? Casting my friends without their knowledge?
Nice. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 29th, 2010|05:52 pm] |
Here we go again. Rather than providing much needed leadership on the oil spill crisis, President Obama and the liberals in Congress instead are trying to use it as an excuse to push through a cap and trade program -- yet another big government initiative that will do nothing to stem the millions of gallons of oil spilling into the ocean, and which will have a negative impact on hard-working American families and the economy as a whole.
Cap and trade effectively constitutes an enormous, hidden tax on the American people and American businesses. It will lead to higher joblessness and make a bad economic situation even worse. And because it will simply move greenhouse gas emitters from America to other nations like China, it won't do a thing to affect climate change.
At a time when we need leaders who will focus on solving the problems facing this nation today -- stopping the oil spill, strengthening our economy, and creating an environment in which job creation can thrive -- we instead have leaders more interested in growing government. Whether it's cap and trade, a costly stimulus bill, auto company bailouts, job-killing card check legislation, or a health care law that imposes higher taxes, President Obama and the liberals controlling Congress have come down on the side of big government over and over again. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 17th, 2010|04:13 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  hopeful | ] |
After two conversations with two very independent girlfriends of mine, I realized...well, re-realized that I have lost a major part of myself. Where has my sense of independence gone? Why am I constantly searching for a girlfriend type person? Too much too soon. I've got one life to live, and I don't want to find the love of my life right now. I don't want to be with one person from 21 years old until forever. I want to explore, and get out there, and learn more about people ,and about love, and all the things two people can have and share. I'm not longer looking for a girlfriend or a super deep, rock you to your core type of relationship. I need to focus on regaining my sense of independence and re-strengthening who I am. I need to be stronger on my own, to pass the trials and tribulations ahead of me. I can't rely on or NEED anyone else.
Does this mean I'm forsaking women? Not at all. This just means that priority 1 isn't finding love anymore. A girl to enjoy life day by day and activities with? sure, I'd love that. But don't expect to become my whole world, or my number 1 priority. I've done that before in the long haul, I've jumped into it too soon before I was even established with someone, and it's NOT the path to take.
I'm a very caring guy. Doesn't mean she can't be my number 1 girl. My only girl, in fact, but not the biggest thing in my life.
I need to have fun, I need to gain life experiences. LIFE experiences, not necessarily LOVE experiences.
Would it have to be exclusive and committed? Normal me would say: Hell yes, what is it if it's not that? But who knows. Is my enjoyment of hypothetical her not enough to satiate me?
But I digress, I'm already ahead of myself...
Bottom line is: People say love doesn't come if you're looking for it. NEWSFLASH: I'm not looking anymore. |
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